by Beloved Heartsong
Spiritual bypass is the use of whatever means we employ to not deal with what is true and real within our emotional bodies. We can all see the places in our lives that aren’t working as well as we would like. Why they aren’t most often stems from unconscious belief systems. If we knew what they were, we would have addressed and fixed them. We all have core subconscious patterns of thought, some which developed before birth, some as children and they have replayed themselves over and over in our lives like a scratched record. These patterns drive us and run the show much more than we realize. Because we are not aware of them, they remain unaddressed until our persistent behaviors, addictions, discomfort or relationship patterns scream loud enough to capture our attention and make us want to change.
Inner awareness and development, or the lack thereof, creates our outer personal and collective experience. All over the world, there are levels of awareness and resonance that create pockets of thought, interest groups and communities. Each offers a mask, a veil if you will, that separates it from what doesn’t seem to belong in the proverbial box that holds as its focus, the defining attributes that make it unique; that give it its flavor and character.
Each individual creates the opportunity within themselves to pick and choose what will and won’t serve their highest good. The veil each wears, serves their personal growth; allowing for the lessons of contrast to educate and develop them through the mirror of their outer experiences until they choose something new. Each choice becomes an adventure into a new expression of the last, until the veil thins and eventually lifts.
Whatever the outward appearance of our daily lives, growth is inevitable. We either grow unconsciously as life seems to shape us by default, or with the budding awareness that we are opening and changing and that there is more to us, our perception and substance than we previously knew. And, there are those for whom self development is a delicious endeavor.
Whatever “box” the life we were born to afforded us, we can choose to grow our inner selves beyond our childhood, within and above life circumstances, affiliations, family, friends, what we do and how we have defined ourselves by what we do. We can learn to simply BE, although learning to BE-come our fuller selves isn’t always simple.
Many start from the outside – trying to change those around them and their outer circumstances to align their lives in the way they see fit. And, although we can arrive at the door of inner development from any vantage point, far fewer start from the inside to affect change in their outer lives. A great number arrive at this threshold out of desperation.
Why is that? Well, the way we perceive the world with our outer senses, it often seems logical to blame outer circumstances and others for our dissatisfaction and discomfort. When we do, we often don’t realize we are betraying ourselves by giving our responsibility and power away to whatever or whomever we are blaming. Our judgment and projections create the feeling and perception of separation, and because in Truth we are never separate from our Source and therefore each other, those beliefs create and magnetize to us the outer expressions of separation, limitation and betrayal in our experience. It takes a higher level of spiritual maturity, growth and wisdom to truly integrate the knowing that we create our reality- individually and collectively from the inside-out.
The Higher Selves of others are all cooperative classmates. The entire universe conspires in every moment to uplift and bless us with more love, light and awareness. Our classmates become the messengers bringing the messages (that we don’t always enjoy receiving) to bring deeper awareness and in-sight to our lives. They teach us that what we fear, avoid, deny or bury in our subconscious, comes back to haunt us through a myriad of experiences and messengers until we bring our loving Presence to integrate and heal it.
It is so easy, in this day and age, to distract ourselves from our discomfort. We are most often taught by society to work, live and think in certain ways, and are less often taught to be true to ourselves, to follow our hearts and inner knowing. And, then after abandoning ourselves in such a profound way, to fit in and follow the example that has been set for us, we live our lives by society’s or someone else’s standards , unhappy and in dis-ease. We end up creating exactly that which we didn’t want in our lives. We don’t understand why after doing as we were taught, that we are not happier and more fulfilled.
There are a million ways to entertain and engage (or more accurately; dis-engage) the parts of us that don’t want to feel the depth of our fear, frustration, anger, pain, sadness, memories and longing. We identify ourselves with our pain, illness and circumstances, yet we eat, drink, socialize and find a myriad of ways and addictions to “zone out” to escape our perceived pain. And, in the name of taking care of ourselves, we come up with many excuses to justify our actions in defense of not approaching our pain. In doing this, we avoid exactly that which holds the key to our freedom, release and healing.
We aren’t supposed to run and flee from pain; it is an opportunity to be present with an un-integrated part of ourselves. That part is desiring and requiring our loving and patient embrace to come BE with it and bring it into the circle of wholeness rather than separate ourselves from it. It is an invitation from our Spirit to BE-come.
If we let our pride step out of the way and don’t distract or numb ourselves from the discomfort, we find the parts of ourselves that have yet to be met with the conscious love, attention and PRESENCE that they are so hungry for. Simply BE-ing with what IS can be enough; not judging it or fearing it, just noticing and allowing; giving voice or a sound to the shadow; freeing it from a time when you did not know how to integrate it with loving consciousness.
One of the easiest ways to begin to become more aware is to simply BE. Most of us are not encouraged or even taught how to BE. A simple example of this is that as children, we are told to snap out of our “day dreams”. We learn to be embarrassed that we were present with ourselves and not the group. We are taught over and over again that the measure of a good person is what they DO- and that makes them who they ARE. Yet, who we truly ARE behind the veils of our personae is God, Source, Spirit, universal life force and already whole and healed, loved and held in infinite Grace. This is the true and eternal part of us, the “I” in me and the “I” in you. This truth is often the part of us we most ignore or abandon completely. How can we expect the outer manifestations of life to show up for us if we abandon the truest part of our (Inner) Selves?
So, what does BE-ing look like? How do we get a sense of Self worth if we are not doing? BE-ing can be a momentary experience or a way of BE-ing with life. As with anything in life, the more we practice something, the better we get at it. Even on a cherished vacation, we need time to adjust to a new state of BE-ing. After months of daily stress, multi-tasking, going and doing and performing, it can take a few days of vacation to settle in to a new level of relaxation. And, just as we start to get the hang of it, it’s usually time to return home to the grind of Do-ing again.
Sometimes, from just Be-ing, we receive insights, guidance, inspiration and clarity. We remember the truth of who we are. We remember we are not our jobs, families, thoughts, emotions, pains and stances- they just pass through us. We wear them for a while, but they are not us. We are so much more- we are life force itself, God in motion, the love, the light, the wisdom and the Grace.
And, even if we take literally just one moment to be still and aware of our Inner Presence before we drive the car, before we go into a meeting, before we express our anger, make a decision and before we make love, we will then place ourselves more in alignment with the Inner Presence in all life and all beings. Meeting each other and life from and in that place affords us greater harmony and alignment- inside and out.
In the circle of life, the wholeness and unity of All is always Present….
and is re-presented within each of us. Where we are on the path at any given moment in relation to others is not better than or less than. It simply is. We are all learning and growing in the same classroom. We may have judgments, beliefs and perceptions that make us feel superior or inferior, yet, if we drop our veils long enough to remember the light, love and wisdom that is our Source and Truth, we can re-member our consciousness into the all inclusive circle of life and know that we are whole, we are One, we are healed. And, once we truly know that, healing is an inside job and there is really nothing to heal except our perceptions.